CAN’T YOU F***ING WATCH WHERE YOU’RE GOING?

The man, wearing a coat way too heavy for the warm day and walking a dog way too big for the path, walked by the canal. The woman, wearing a sleeveless floral dress and floppy straw hat, cycled up behind him on a basket-festooned bicycle.

As she approached she rang her bell. The ringing spooked the dog; it barked and jumped in front of the bike yanking the man with it. The woman managed to swerve, avoiding a collision, but the man and dog fell into the nettles.

The man, pride stung more than skin, shouted down the path.

“You stupid f*ing woman. Can’t you f*ing watch where you’re going?”

The woman, gently pedalling away, turned in her saddle, raised her hand to wave and wearing the biggest smile, called out, “Don’t be angry.”

And then she was gone.